Hardcore tattoo guidelines – These are not traditional hardcore tattoos, they may have consequences!
1. Brass Knuckles – if you have never been in a fight you should not be getting a pair of brass knuckles tattooed on your body. Actually if you are not a fighter or have never used a pair, have never gotten rocked by a pair, own a pair, and/or its not your nickname or birth name, you should refrain from getting a pair of brass knucks tattooed on your self as you look like a complete tool, no matter what the metaphorical hardcore symbolism you believe it stands for. Like what does that mean to put brass knuckles on your body? You are tough?
2. Neck tats: Totally unacceptable as your first and only piece. This includes your girlfriend/boyfriends name on the neck, kid’s name on the neck and even the “in memory” piece. You will regret that shit later. And if you don’t ever have to look for a job again, then the rule is you must be mostly full everywhere else before the neck tat; as in out of room elsewhere on your body, hip hop.
3. Spider webs on elbows: Unless you’re a biker, been to jail, or killed somebody, spider webs on your elbows will not make you look tough. You will one day get called out, and those webs will not help you in said brawl.
4. Virgin Mary - You must be devout Catholic and Latino.
5. Praying hands – I pray you do pray for all of us and everyone who has violated these rules and see rule #4 as that shit applies here too. People recovering and in 12 steps on their knees get a free pass on this if it gets them through.
6. Tear drop/face tats – If you have not murdered many and done real hard time, are not in a big gang, you should not be getting a tear drop or anything tattooed on your face. Really keep that shit off your face and out of mine. You'll look like a carnie come green time; Murder, prison time, real loss, that's it.
7. Straight-edge tats: Haven’t kids learned from those that have preceded them, all long hairs cut their hair and all straight edge kids grow up. That shit will look mad silly when you’re out with your peoples blowing lines and knocking back pints at the bar years later. Avoid the ridicule and inevitable cover-up.
8. Huge chest pieces on girls: I don’t even know what to say about this, you ain’t a sailor, but there’s been this insane number of girls getting huge chest pieces lately. Tits are sweet, don’t fuck them up.
9. Band Tats:
- Punk rock band tats – you need to have been shitfaced, done it yourself at a very young age, been in the band or at least toured in the band, though touring with the band 20 years later doesn't qualify you black bars.
- Metal tats - I know that Slipknot piece must’ve looked fresh when you were going sick in the pit for them at Ozzfest, but one day they will inevitably put out a record you’ll be describing as a sellout, and you’ll be looking to burn that shit off with a hot hanger. Stick to classic bands that have a solid catalog and influence.
10. No crew tats before you are 100% sure you are in. Hanging with them and assuming you are can be a fatal mistake and the tattoo a reminder of how 'down you are not' everyday thereafter.
11. Portraits: I understand the desire to get a loved one’s face tattooed on your body. Please think long and hard before going that route as most come out looking nothing like your loved one, but like Corky from A Life Goes On. Please, please, please, do not get the face of your favorite musician tattooed on your body. That shit looks fucking dumb always! Unless your father or mother did just pass and you are on LA or Miami Ink I don’t know if you will get the appreciation you are looking for here. Reserved for relative only if.
****** Bonus *********Your bad flash from last year when you were a jock and hadn’t ever been to a show is not traditional now that you think you are down with the culture, its just bad flash taz.
